The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Easter Funnies
05:20 Mar 30 2007
Times Read: 721

Q: What would you get if you crossed the Easter Bunny with an overstressed person?

A: An Easter basket case!



Q: What's yellow, has long ears, and grows on trees?

A: The Easter Bunana!



Q: Why are you stuffing all that Easter candy into your mouth?"

A: "Because it doesn't taste as good if I stuff it in my ears."



Q: Did you hear the one about the Easter Bunny who sat on a bee?

A: It's a tender tail!



Q: What happened when the Easter Bunny caught his head in the fan?

A: It took ears off his life!



Q: Why do we paint Easter eggs?

Because it's easier than trying to wallpaper them!



Q: Why was the monster sitting in his Easter basket?

He was trying to hatch his peanut butter eggs!



Q: What do you need if your chocolate eggs mysteriously disappear?

You need an eggsplanation!



Q: How did the soggy Easter Bunny dry himself?

With a hare dryer!



Q: How is the Easter Bunny like Shaquille O'Neal?

A:They're both famous for stuffing baskets!



Q: What's big and purple and hugs your Easter basket?

A:The Easter Barney!



Q: How does the Easter Bunny paint all of those eggs?

A:He hires Santa's elves during the off-season.



Q: How should you send a letter to the Easter Bunny?

A: By hare mail!



Q: How does the Easter Bunny stay in shape?

A: He does lots of hare-obics.



Q: What's the difference between the Easter Bunny and a silly monster ?

A: One's a hare-head and the other's an air-head!



Q: What would you get if you crossed the Easter Bunny with Chinese food?

A: Hop suey!

Load off
03:40 Mar 30 2007
Times Read: 724

There is something wonderful about marking something off the to do list that has been looming there for months. It certainly is like taking a load off...:)

It makes me laugh every time.
15:36 Mar 29 2007
Times Read: 732

It is what I strive to do...
15:13 Mar 29 2007
Times Read: 744

What wise quote fits you?

Allergy season.......arggggggg!
15:04 Mar 29 2007
Times Read: 745

Allergy season in Kentucky....makes me feel like this....

and this

14:52 Mar 29 2007
Times Read: 747

14:48 Mar 29 2007
Times Read: 749








18 years now....wow.....I did not realize it had been that long. Yeah ME!

Would you?
04:10 Mar 29 2007
Times Read: 753

If you could

> read another person's mind

> kill someone and know you would get away with it

> steal a large amount of money and get away

> have numerous sex partners with no repercussions

> force others to do your will







WOULD YOU?????



Or if you could

> give someone money and them never know

> do a kindness for someone you do not know

> donate a body part while still living

> stop to help a stranger

> create something to stop world hunger

> work to clean the environment

> treat your neighbor as you do yourself





WOULD YOU?????

My Teaching Philosophy
16:59 Mar 28 2007
Times Read: 758

My Teaching Philosophy



I think that teaching and learning are life long processes. I have learned much in the last seven years teaching social work principles and skills to students. My philosophy has also evolved. Currently, I try to make the following my priorities in teaching:

1. Make the classroom atmosphere comfortable enough to encourage open discussion among the students and allow them to ask challenging questions of themselves, each other and even of me.

2. Be the role model that I am teaching them to become.

3. Focus on generalist skills that will allow them to work with various sized populations.

4. Challenge them to use and improve their critical thinking skills.

5. Intersperse ethics, values, professionalism, and diversity throughout all classes.

6. Everyone learns differently, therefore a variety of learning experiences are provided to make the learning meaningful and hopefully, fun.

7. Communication skills are vital to social workers, both oral and written.





Teaching Methodology, Strategies, and Objectives



I hope to achieve my teaching philosophy through the following:

1. Use of role plays, simulations, case studies, disciplinary exchange, lecture, classroom discussion, group work, field experiences, journals, guest speakers, peer teaching, and other manners as needed.

2. Being accessible to students both in and out of the classroom.

3. Stay current on current issues and trends and bring those along with real life situations into the classroom.

4. Provide various forms of evaluation of student performance such as written exams, oral reports, practical application exercises, and peer review.

OH MY GODDESS.....Old Age has NOTHING on this woman!!!!
03:26 Mar 28 2007
Times Read: 764

One of the most famous shipwrecks in US history
03:16 Mar 28 2007
Times Read: 765

Edmund Fitzgerald sank in the Great Lakes -Superior Lake, during a storm. This is it's story in song.

Navy Spirit
02:57 Mar 28 2007
Times Read: 769

The Indomitable human spirit to find a way to be creative and playful under stress and war time.



I think that is admirable and worth a view or two!

Lovely sixes
21:33 Mar 22 2007
Times Read: 775






Pages Viewed:

60666

The donkey
11:56 Mar 22 2007
Times Read: 778

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do.



Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey.



He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down.



A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up.



As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up.



Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!



Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.



Remember the five simple rules to be happy:



Free your heart from hatred - Forgive.



Free your mind from worries - Most never happen.



Live simply and appreciate what you have.



Give more.



Expect less



NOW ...........



Enough of that crap . . .



The donkey later came back, and bit the farmer who had tried to bury him. The gash from the bite got infected and the farmer eventually died in agony from septic shock.



MORAL FROM TODAY'S LESSON:



When you do something wrong, and try to cover your ass, it always comes back to bite you.

Wish me luck!!
03:14 Mar 22 2007
Times Read: 781

My work contract is up in May and I have been worried about having a job after that. About a month ago I called and left a message at a local facility...I never heard from them. Figured that they had moved on or where not interested, whatever. BUT They called TODAY and want my resume and a cover letter....etc. WHOHOO



Happy dance here.......everyone wish me luck!!!

Soapbox time
12:52 Mar 21 2007
Times Read: 789








You know...I tend not to care a whole lot about the rankings and ratings and so forth. But today for some reason....it is just pissing me off. I give 10s to folks because I think they earned it and they come over and give me 8s or 9 and no comment as to WHY or no comment at all. I worked really hard on all my things but if they truly do not think they are up to par, fine, but at least tell me why.



But, then I think of something I was told by the cat....that there are covens/houses that never give high ratings to anyone outside their membership. That.....is not ok. If someone earns a 10 by all that is just.......give them a freaking 10. Do not be so damn petty about "oh s/he isn't in my click so they aren't worthy" .....bah......go back to high school kiddies.

Darn eyes..
03:11 Mar 21 2007
Times Read: 792






It finally caught me.....the age has it.....I picked up my BIFOCALS today. sigh.......hell getting old..



birdy flies away.....feeling much taller and amazed at all the sights with the new glasses....

I refuse...
03:09 Mar 21 2007
Times Read: 793

I refuse to rate portfolios that prominently show self mutilation by cutting. I just do not think it is a good thing to do and I certainly will not promote showing it off with a rate. Nope not doing it.

VW--It IS all Nightgame's fault.....here is the proof!!!!!
15:34 Mar 16 2007
Times Read: 800

For my other sissy - Nightgame---the witchy kitty of the group!
15:27 Mar 16 2007
Times Read: 803

For my new friend RedQueen---the puppy of the group!
15:24 Mar 16 2007
Times Read: 804

For my sis---Vampirewitch39--the bestest one I know:)
15:22 Mar 16 2007
Times Read: 806

Who'd a thunk it???
02:52 Mar 16 2007
Times Read: 809

Who would have ever thunk it?



Elemental---News Master of her coven.



Well.......huh.

IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER - by Erma Bombeck
13:58 Mar 15 2007
Times Read: 811

In honor of women's history month and in memory of Erma Bombeck, who lost her fight with cancer.



IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER - by Erma Bombeck

(written after she found out she was dying from cancer)



I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren't there for the day.



I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.



I would have talked less and listened more.



I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded.



I would have eaten the popcorn in the 'good' living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.



I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.



I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband. I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.



I would have sat on the lawn with my grass stains.



I would have cried and laughed less while watching television and more while watching life.



I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn't show soil, or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.



Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I'd have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.



When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, "Later. Now go get washed up for dinner." There would have been more "I love you's," more "I'm sorry's."



But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute...look at it and really see it...live it and never give it back.



STOP SWEATING THE SMALL STUFF!!!



Don't worry about who doesn't like you, who has more, or who's doing what. Instead, let's cherish the relationships we have with those who do love us.



Let's think about what God HAS blessed us with , and what we are doing each day to promote ourselves mentally, physically, emotionally. I hope you have a blessed day.

Chinese Proverbs
13:57 Mar 15 2007
Times Read: 812






CHINESE PROVERBS



*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*

Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*

Man who run in front of car get tired.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*

Man who run behind car get exhausted.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*

Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*~*

Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*

Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.

~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~*

Man with one chopstick go hungry.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~

Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*

Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*~*

Baseball is wrong: man with four balls cannot walk.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~

Panties not best thing on earth -- but next to best thing on earth.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~

War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*~*

Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~

Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*~*

It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~

Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~

Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~

Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*

Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~

Man who fart in church sit in own pew.

*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*~*

Crowded elevator smell different to midget.

Dirty rat!!!
04:03 Mar 15 2007
Times Read: 823

On 04:01:08 Mar 15 2007 Elemental wrote:



you still on? thought you were calling me back after the facial? gmmmmmm

lol



On 04:20:23 Mar 15 2007 Vampirewitch39 wrote:



Sorry- I was working on my port- added a lot of new ones.



And my journal.



But I am off to bed now. Night.



*rat hugs the birdys leg, and runs for her hole*



On 04:23:10 Mar 15 2007 Elemental wrote:



Like THAT is an excuse....you will pay my wee rat.....there are things in that journal alone to pay for.......but now....



*birdy....makes a flutter with her wings in a menacing manner.......just wait..***



VampireWitch39 Wrote:

* rat sticks her head out and says to her birdy*



Why do you think I ran for my hole?



* you hear rat claws running deeper in the hole*



Night sis... love you.





NOW HOW can a birdy stay mad at a rat who loves her?? Damn rat......knows what buttons to push....lol

love you too sis!

22:38 Mar 14 2007
Times Read: 825

Welcome Elemental





Your Status:

Shaitan





Pages Viewed:

55000





Time Spent:

20.89 days





You have completed

97% of this level.

Rings of Fire..hilarious!!!
14:44 Mar 09 2007
Times Read: 829

For those of us who have been having tummy troubles this week.....you HAVE to go here!!!





http://www.bentbay. dk/ring_of_ Fire.htm

Eye candy for the women!!
14:40 Mar 09 2007
Times Read: 831










Bet your mind was on other things huh??? lol PERV!!!!:)

No wonder we have a skewed vision of beauty!
14:38 Mar 09 2007
Times Read: 832

DEER??????
14:37 Mar 09 2007
Times Read: 833

Get Away From my Deer!



It was Saturday morning and Jake, an avid hunter, woke up ready to go bag the first deer of the season. He walks down to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise he finds his wife, Alice, sitting there, fully dressed in camouflage. Jake asks her, "What are you up to?" Alice smiles, "I'm going hunting with you!" Jake, though he has many reservations, reluctantly decides to take her along. They arrive at the hunting site. Jake sets his wife safely up in the tree stand and tells her: "If you see a deer, take careful aim on it and I'll come running back as soon as I hear the shot." Jake walks away with a smile on his face knowing that Alice couldn't bag an elephant -- much less a deer. But not 10 minutes pass when he is startled as he hears an array of gunshots. Quickly, Jake starts running back. As Jake gets closer to her stand, he hears Alice screaming, "Get away from my deer!" Confused, Jake races faster towards his screaming wife. And again he hears her

yell, "Get away from my deer!" followed by another volley of gunfire. Now within sight of where he had left his wife, Jake is surprised to see a cowboy, with his hands high in the air. The cowboy, obviously distraught, says, "Okay, lady, okay! You can have your deer! Just let me get my saddle off it!"

Goal reached!!!!
02:27 Mar 09 2007
Times Read: 836

Regular Member

Favor earned: 4000

Celtic Woman
02:04 Mar 07 2007
Times Read: 838

I recently discovered this group--and here they are singing a song from my favorite movie.

My birthdate happenings and meanings
23:14 Mar 06 2007
Times Read: 843

Your date of conception was on or about 13 June 1963 which was a Thursday.



You were born on a Thursday

under the astrological sign Pisces.

Your Life path number is 1.



Life Path Compatibility:

You are most compatible with those with the Life Path numbers 1, 5 & 7.

You should get along well with those with the Life Path numbers 3 & 9.

You may or may not get along well with those with the Life Path number 8.

You are least compatible with those with the Life Path numbers 2, 4, 6, 11 & 22.



The Julian calendar date of your birth is 2438459.5.

The golden number for 1964 is 8.

The epact number for 1964 is 16.

The year 1964 was a leap year.



Your birthday falls into the Chinese year beginning 2/13/1964 and ending 2/1/1965.

You were born in the Chinese year of the Dragon.



Your Native American Zodiac sign is Wolf; your plant is Plantain.



You were born in the Egyptian month of Pachons, the first month of the season of Shomu (Harvest).



Your date of birth on the Hebrew calendar is 21 AdarI 5724.

Or if you were born after sundown then the date is 22 AdarI 5724.



The Mayan Calendar long count date of your birthday is 12.17.10.8.15 which is

12 baktun 17 katun 10 tun 8 uinal 15 kin



The Hijra (Islamic Calendar) date of your birth is Thursday, 20 Shavval 1383 (1383-10-20).



The date of Easter on your birth year was Sunday, 29 March 1964.

The date of Orthodox Easter on your birth year was Sunday, 3 May 1964.

The date of Ash Wednesday (the first day of Lent) on your birth year was Wednesday 12 February 1964.

The date of Whitsun (Pentecost Sunday) in the year of your birth was Sunday 17 May 1964.

The date of Whisuntide in the year of your birth was Sunday 24 May 1964.

The date of Rosh Hashanah in the year of your birth was Monday, 7 September 1964.

The date of Passover in the year of your birth was Saturday, 28 March 1964.

The date of Mardi Gras on your birth year was Tuesday 11 February 1964.



As of 3/6/2007 6:02:47 PM EST

You are 43 years old.

You are 516 months old.

You are 2,244 weeks old.

You are 15,706 days old.

You are 376,962 hours old.

You are 22,617,722 minutes old.

You are 1,357,063,367 seconds old.



Celebrities who share your birthday:

Jake Lloyd (1989) Niki Taylor (1975) Kevin Connolly (1974)

Andy Gibb (1958) Michael Warren (1946) Samantha Eggar (1939)

Dean Stockwell (1936) James Noble (1922) Rex Harrison (1908)



Top songs of 1964

I Want to Hold Your Hand by Beatles Can't Buy Me Love by Beatles

There! I've Said It Again by Bobby Vinton Baby Love by Supremes

Oh, Pretty Woman by Roy Orbison The House of the Rising Sun by Animals

Chapel of Love by Dixie Cups I Feel Fine by Beatles

She Loves You by Beatles I Get Around by Beach Boys



Your age is the equivalent of a dog that is 6.14716242661448 years old. (You're still chasing cats!)







There are 365 days till your next birthday

on which your cake will have 44 candles.



Those 44 candles produce 44 BTUs,

or 11,088 calories of heat (that's only 11.0880 food Calories!) .

You can boil 5.03 US ounces of water with that many candles.





In 1964 there were approximately 4.2 million births in the US.

In 1964 the US population was approximately 179,323,175 people, 50.6 persons per square mile.

In 1964 in the US there were approximately 1,523,000 marriages (8.5%) and 393,000 divorces (2.2%)

In 1964 in the US there were approximately 1,712,000 deaths (9.5 per 1000)

In the US a new person is born approximately every 8 seconds.

In the US one person dies approximately every 12 seconds.



In 1964 the population of Australia was approximately 11,280,429.

In 1964 there were approximately 229,149 births in Australia.

In 1964 in Australia there were approximately 86,013 marriages and 7,917 divorces.

In 1964 in Australia there were approximately 100,594 deaths.





Your birthstone is Aquamarine



The Mystical properties of Aquamarine



Aquamarine is often used to experience love and mercy. It is said to help ease depression and grief.

Some lists consider these stones to be your birthstone. (Birthstone lists come from Jewelers, Tibet, Ayurvedic Indian medicine, and other sources)



Jade, Rock Crystal, Bloodstone



Your birth tree is



Weeping Willow, the Melancholy

Beautiful but full of melancholy, attractive, very empathic, loves anything beautiful and tasteful, loves to travel, dreamer, restless, capricious, honest, can be influenced but is not easy to live with, demanding, good intuition, suffers in love but finds sometimes an anchoring partner.







There are 294 days till Christmas 2007!

There are 307 days till Orthodox Christmas!



The moon's phase on the day you were

born was waning gibbous.

Numerical meaning of my name
23:11 Mar 06 2007
Times Read: 844

After reading the thread on the meaning of a name I looked mine up. Here is what it means:

God is gracious.Consecrated to God.



I was a bit more curious when it had a numerical meaning. This is what that meant:



There are 7 letters in your name.

Those 7 letters total to 22

There are 4 vowels and 3 consonants in your name.



Your number is: 22

The characteristics of #22 are: The Master Builder, large endeavors, powerful force, a leader.

The expression or destiny for #22:

Your Expression is represented by the master number, 22. The key word for the number 22 is that of master builder. This is a very hard number to fully live up to because it is capable of such great accomplishment. You no doubt will be extremely capable at whatever work you choose to do in life. You are especially equipped to handle large scale undertakings in the material world. Thus, the reference to master builder. The 22 possesses unique qualities and often very unorthodox approaches to problem solving. You are apt to be a very strong leader, and one who is not afraid to lead in new directions. Your perceptions are well beyond the norm.

When the 22 Expression operates within you in a positive vein, you are endowed with the most practical approach, but this practical or material sense is tempered with an awareness of non-material forces. You are very much the idealist, which the material skills to build and develop for the good of mankind. In a positive 22, the inner strength is clearly visible, and if developed, this strength will possess the charisma to attract a following.

If expressed in a negative manner, the 22 may accentuate unorthodox methods to the point of eccentricity. This negative expression can also be very dominating and overbearing.

Your Soul Urge number is: 5

A Soul Urge number of 5 means:

The 5 soul urge or motivation would like to follow a life of freedom, excitement, adventure and unexpected happening. The idea of travel and freedom to roam intrigues you. You are very much the adventurer at heart. Not particularly concerned about your future or about getting ahead, you can seem superficial and unmotivated.

In a positive sense, the energies of the number 5 make you very adaptable and versatile. You have a natural resourcefulness and enthusiasm that may mark you as a progressive with a good mind and active imagination. You seem to have a natural inclination to be a pace-setter. You are attracted to the unusual and the fast paced.

You may be overly restless and impatient at times. You may dislike the routine work that you are engaged in, and tend to jump from activity to activity, without ever finishing anything. You may have difficulty with responsibility. You don't want to be tied down to a relationship, and it may be hard to commit to one person.

Your Inner Dream number is: 8

An Inner Dream number of 8 means:

You dream of success in the business or political world, of power and control of large material endeavors. You crave authority and recognition of executive skills. Your secret self may have very strong desire to become an entrepreneur.